I discovered a blog called The Gamer’s Girl, which I thought could have an interesting theme. I am after all a gamer’s girl myself, though in this case I guess I have a simpler life, since I’m also a gamer.
So, I found myself reading through the posts. And frowning while reading a lot of the text there.
Although I can relate to and agree with much of what’s written, it seems that the author is someone who for whatever reason, decides to think of herself as less relevant than her gamer boyfriend. I understand that if someone is in a non-pauseable game and at a boss, will ask you for twelve minutes so they can finish the battle. Assuming, that is, that you don’t have an emergency, because if your house is on fire, I think the boss can wait. 😉
Another thing that made me cringe was, that for whatever reason, the blog author believes that to look ‘cool’ at the eyes of her boyfriend’s friends and gamers in general, you need to keep buying cool stuff, and cooking for your gamer guy. Tell me, why in the world would you do that if you’re only getting thirty minutes (oh, what abundancy!) of attention per day? Do you really think a guy who’s dedicating 3.125% of his awake time (estimating he sleeps 8 hours), or 6.250% if he’s away for work 8 hours, gives enough of a damn about you that he deserves getting pampered?
What could she possibly be rewarding with her baked brownies? And ‘giving him a treat’ as a reward? Is he a dog or something?
My gamer guy gives me attention, and not the absurd half hour a day, and as such I occasionally make him stuff he likes, like chilli, or strawberry ice cream. Or buy him his favourite beer to accompany his dinner. But guess what? I’m not in a relationship with a guy who plays games first and only has me as an accessory for whom he can only dedicate a minuscule portion of his time. He also cooks my favourites for me, he also gets me cherries because I love them. He does stuff for me too. And not an almost inexistent quantity of things, just to say he did them. There’s a balance.
Your other half comes first. Gaming comes after. This applies to both of us.
To be a Gamer’s Girl, you don’t need to nulify yourself or diminish your need for his attention. If you’re actually dating a guy who loves you, he won’t only give you a half hour of attention every day and then proceed to game while you, well, work for him. Respect his gaming time? Sure thing. But his gaming time can’t be the-time-he’s-home-minus-30-minutes. Guess what? That’s not really healthy.
I’m not sure if the author of the blog has a job, but I do. I, like my ‘gamer boy’, spend several hours at work, outside our house and when I come home, feel that both me and him have a duty to make things around the house work. Yes, I cook for him, and he does the same for me, we both clean the house, we go shopping for household stuff, and… we both game.
I reject the idea of ever dating someone who will think digital worlds are more important than the person you share your life with. Do you think a guy would like it if his girlfriend/wife came home from work, and every day talked to him for thirty minutes and then… time’s up!… she just ignored him for the rest of the evening because she’s playing something? I’m very doubtful he would find it acceptable, much less normal.
I’m doubtful that thing can be called having a relationship.
Also, I’d like to know what’s so complicated about having to ‘sort through’ the universal remote to watch TV if it’s on ‘console mode’. It’s not rocket science, and it sure as hell doesn’t take much time to do.
Unless your ‘universal remote’ is written in Klingon. That I could maybe understand.
How do us, two happy gamers get along despite our gaming? Real life always comes first. We play as a hobby, not an addiction, and therefore, we first think of each other. We can still play whatever games we want, without our house collapsing, or our relationship being blown to bits (no pun intended). It’s a matter of balance. We cook, we clean, we organize, we go to the beach, we just go out for walks, we watch movies and series, we game.
We respect each other.
Half an hour a day for the person you’re supposed to love is not respect. It’s laughable.